The Randomist

I like awards.  I like the getting of them and I like the having of them.  I've never won a trophy in my life, but I'm sorely tempted to have one made for myself because I can.  That won't be happening anytime soon because I'm poor and have better things to do, like stealing awards I was never given from websites that offer them freely.  I honestly feel as though I deserve each and every one of the awards TheBloggess  posted on her blog today.  Every.  One.  We'll start with inefficient efficiency. I work in a photolab at my friendly neighborhood "store-mart" and I do the frowning intently at the computer screen thing to make myself appear busy when in reality, I'm really just looking for naked pictures at best and old men in speedos at worst and being pissed off that the raunchiest thing in our system is someone eating a penis cake with asymmetrical balls.   As long as I have the editing box up, I can totally say I'm just enhancing someon...

Now, I’ve been known to have a typo or five thousand in my illustrious writing career, but they are just that, typos. There is a world of difference between a typo, a misspelling, and a grammatical error… Let’s not leave out “sheer idiocy”.   There have also been times, in fits of confusion and mental anguish, where I have given in and researched the proper usage of certain words and how they are spelled. I feel that God invented the Google search bar for this very purpose. My most prized source of information on all things grammar related is Grammar Girl  Typo: An accidental misspelling, addition of an excess letter, or the left out letter. ACCIDENTAL! I understand that it happens to other people too and it’s (LOOK AT THAT APOSTROPHE!) usually fairly obvious when it’s accidental. Misspelled words: There is no excuse. Your dyslexia does not faze me because you have the ability to proof read everything you write BEFORE you click “Comment”, “Send”, or “Enter”. Unlike th...